Work you vs. home you; the struggle is real

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Every morning of every day, millions of people begin their daily routines; wake up, make coffee, get dressed, brush teeth, grab laptop, cannot locate keys, search for keys, find keys, leave home, commute to work, Starbucks for more coffee, get to office, begin working day.

When I lived and worked in London, I overheard so many conversations on my journey to work, sometimes this was the highlight of my day but on one particular journey I overheard two colleagues discussing their day ahead, they appeared to be nervous and whatever they were heading towards seemed like a big deal. One turned to the other and said, are you going to go in as you, you or work you? To this day I still hear this reference too many times or I see behaviors that demonstrate a work personality and honestly there really is no need for it. As I listened further on into the conversation I thought that being “work you” does not make you either credible nor does it make you authentic. By putting on a work version of themselves I felt that they were putting themselves under unnecessary pressure which was only going to highlight the nervousness of their situation not only in their performance but this would also show to those that they were so keen to impress.

Personally, I believe that people are much more amiable when they are themselves which makes it easier to form genuine relationships, build trust and work collaboratively. We’ve all seen what can happen when people try to be someone they are not such as the recent activity in Celebrity Big Brother; the stitches soon start to unravel and with that follows the breakdown of trust, respect and credibility. So why do so many people still rely upon this behavior in the workplace?

Every HR event I have been to recently all had a common theme; authenticity and credibility as a HR professional. These two elements if ignored can be fatal to your career or development as this is what makes HR exactly that, human. Being yourself can significantly increase your credibility in all areas of your work; especially in situations such as mediation or when presenting at a board meeting, when people know you, it opens a wealth of opportunity, makes you approachable and more importantly someone that the business can rely on.

Of course this is not limited to just HR, I have witnessed these behaviors in every place in which I have worked and unsurprisingly at all levels of those businesses.

It begs the question, are HR professionals expected to be perfect within our organisations? I certainly believe to a degree that this is what people actually accept as true but I also think it has a significant impact upon our ability to be genuine. I think it is categorically important as professionals that we accurately guide employees and managers through the required processes in a way in which we choose without losing consistency. It is the same with directors and business leaders, is it entirely possible to lead and maintain a level of integrity?

It is a difficult balance; some would call it a façade to maintain but so many people feel more comfortable conducting themselves in this way. Could it be that some people prefer to be corporate and professional at all times without letting their guard down as to preserve a certain image or is it that there is a fear of vulnerability and how colleagues would perceive them should they reveal their true persona?

Don’t get me wrong, I understand the need for this sometimes especially when you are new to a role and are assessing the boundaries, this is a sensible option. However it is equally important to allow elements of your personality to reflect your work so that others can relate to it; be it a spread sheet, presentation or even in a training room. It also enables you to utlise your full complement of skills to project your knowledge in a way you fully understand yourself which sounds bizarre but so many have tried to be anyone else but themselves only to trip over in a public forum, because let’s be honest, it never happens when nobody is watching does it?!

It is not entirely limited to work life only of course, there is a crossover into our personal space, the real you . This can have an impact on a work life balance and personal relationships so being genuine isn’t just about a perception at work, it’s also a factor in mental health wellbeing.

And the moral of the story is; these situations are entirely avoidable, just be you. Trust me, you’ll be grateful to yourself that you were.

The office Christmas party; potentially HR’s worst nightmare, well may be…

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The office Christmas party, it’s the event of the year for most employees but for HR it can be a stressful with a hint of “what the blooming heck is going to happen this year” dreaded anticipation. I’ve even overheard another HR professional refer to it as if to get through it were similar to surviving the apocalypse!

Don’t get me wrong, we’re not Scrooge’s; in fact HR work hard but my goodness don’t we know how to play hard! We just party in a different way to other employees.

The reasons for this are simple, we may be at the party but have to remain professional. All employees should do this however we don’t live in a perfect world, we’d love nothing more than to join in with our colleagues but then we could be placed in a comprisable situation that HR would really struggle to recover from which can have lasting effects on a career in the profession.

Of course this is not the apocalypse nor is it the perfect world and indeed I’m talking worst case scenario here so the purpose of this post is to point out some simple tips on how to survive the office shindig in the most professional way possible.

 

  1. Set clear boundaries and expectations of behaviour; we are all adults and most should know better but the business can still be liable for the actions taken by overzealous employees when an event is held off site. Highlight the company “events at work” policy would be a better approach than to get employees to sign a liability waiver, because let’s be honest there’s nothing better to get the party started then signing a waiver is there?! (sigh)
  2. Include everyone; no one should be left out and remember not everyone celebrates Christmas, I remember going to a Christmas party in the middle of the year so that all faiths were catered for, imagine a mix of Bhangra and East 17’s Stay Another Day, it was one of those things you needed to be there to appreciate it but I assure you it was one of the best I’ve ever been to!
  3. Lead by example; whilst a joke on the boss can be funny at first, the reputational consequences can be long lasting. Ask your team leaders and managers to be hosts at the evening and remind them of their obligations, whilst this may seem harsh, safety in numbers is never a bad call!
  4. Consider the day the event is held on; if the party is held on a school night then may be consider a later start if possible, may be as an early Christmas present but be clear that they are expected to attend work at a set time and that normal absence procedures will apply and for those feeling a bit worse for wear, may be suggest taking a day’s holiday to sleep the dancing feet off
  5. Make sure everyone gets home safely; make sure that taxis are pre-booked and if at a hotel venue, advise on room bookings in advance of the event

I hope you all have a fantastic start to your party season and don’t forget to make the office party memorable for all the right reasons!

 

#HRActsofKindness David D’Souza; “Kindness is not a word we normally use…”

Over the past few days I have asked many different people what kindness means to them and how it can be applied during their work lives.

The first person I asked was David D’Souza on his thoughts on kindness at work;

“When people ask me about the most important traits in someone I’d like to work with integrity, intelligence and a desire to be helpful normally top the bill. Kindness isn’t a word I’d normally use – but maybe it should because organisations would rarely be worse off for an extra dose of it.

The average person works more hours than they’d ideally like – or, if unemployed, would like the opportunity to work more hours than they would ideally like. We live in a tough old world and there are certain things that always make it more palatable. Kindness – without expectation of reward – is a beautiful and scarce resource. It helps us not just get along but helps getting along to be worthwhile.

So if you can just be kinder. The cost may be minimal or the cost may be great – but the payback is a reward not measured in pounds and pence but in a life worth slightly more worth living. And that is priceless”.

 

#HRActsofKindness pushing the boundaries and what it means to me

At the recent CIPD ACE event, Peter Cheese highlighted that HR needs to think outside of the box by being adaptable to the ever changing environment and look beyond our organisations.

The conference was not just made up of HR professionals, there were teachers, coaches, volunteers and recruiters to name but a few and the same can be said for the Midland Area Partnership event in October. HR has become a focus point and whether we like it or not, the expectations upon us are far greater than we are possibly used to so it is up to us to raise the bar and get involved in areas that sit outside of our comfort zones.

HR Acts of Kindness is designed for us to push those boundaries and look at the bigger picture by taking smaller steps into the areas away from the security blankets known as our offices; the everyday activities and endless distractions. By taking ourselves back to our child-like ways and doing things we may not necessarily practice on a daily basis.

I don’t know about you, but for those who attended CIPD ACE 16, did you grab a selfie at the CIPD stand? As my selfie was being taken, the gentleman asked me who admire the most in business and what my superpower would be and as you can imagine I gave a typical HR answer of “I’d make change management in organisations instantaneous!”. Fantastic and definitely a vision from the dream world I’m sure you’ll agree, but upon reflection, I wouldn’t change the profession, not one part of it right now and the simple reason is that I am enjoying the journey. All of those people at the annual CIPD event and those sat reading this at your desks right now; we’re all on a journey and busy shaping not only the future of HR but shaping the future of work as a whole. The journey is where we learn, develop and grow but it’s also where we gain a sense of achievement and appreciation for the work that we do.

On a personal level; my great grandmother, gave me a strong piece of advice at a young age which carries me through every area of my life. She told me to “always do something you are good at” at the time I don’t think I really understood in all honesty but now it makes perfect sense. HR Acts of Kindness is a product of exactly that; I am kind to people, even when they are not to me, I always believe in second chances and I believe in supporting others not treading on them in order to be successful. All I wanted when I originally signed up for my HR career was to make my family proud and the profession proud, that’s the simple and only reason I do what I do when I get up at 5:30am every morning.

Over the coming days I will be bringing snippets from different people and what kindness means to them and the difference they think it brings. There are people from the HR profession, small business owners, teachers, and students alike so watch this space!

I consider myself incredibly fortunate that I can share HR Acts of Kindness, it’s amazing how many of you around the world are involved and promoting kindness in your organisations. Thank you for all of your messages telling me your stories, keep them coming and I’m really looking forward to crowning some kindness champions.

#HRActsofKindness is back!

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In June this year I launched a small idea called “HR Acts of Kindness” after witnessing the impact of the brexit result. The result not only divided opinion but also divided relationships and had a big impact on the way organisations conducted business.

I remember driving home after seeing the impact it had on my work environment and thinking that there must be a way to turn this divide into a positive and to unite people again and that’s when HR Acts of Kindness was born; in the driving seat of my Mini Cooper!

Little did I know the overwhelming response I would receive to those 5 challenges!

Due to the support and people asking me to bring it back; I wanted to re-launch HR Acts of Kindness with a festive twist in hope to keep the kindness going. You don’t have to be in HR, you just need to have a desire to make a difference. Thank you to all of you who have messaged me, told me your stories and encouraged the success of this small idea that escalated rather quickly!

Christmas can be a difficult time of the year for so many people and I’m asking the HR community to help me kick start a kindness movement which will help those who need it most at this time of year.

At the Annual Conference and Exhibition, Peter Cheese spoke of how HR needs to adapt and be relevant to the needs of not only businesses but our communities and by us working collaboratively we can inspire the future of our profession. By launching HR Acts of Kindness, I believe this provides the perfect opportunity for us to make that impact and not to let what we learnt at ACE become a distant memory as we return to our day jobs.

I gave an interview to Ady Howes at DPG during the CIPD ACE 16 event and if you’d like to see it, I have put the You Tube link here: https://youtu.be/cmeotrPzTS8

Unlike the original HR Acts of Kindness, this time around, I am providing a full list of challenges tomorrow morning which will run from now until Christmas and it covers a whole list of different ways we can utilise our skills to support our work environment, employees, families and communities.

What I’d like to do is to get as many people involved and I want to hear your stories, pictures and anything else you’d like to share with me as you undertake one or more of these challenges.

Most of the challenges are free and there’s bound to be something for everyone to get involved with. Get your teams, departments and anyone else you can think of involved, we need as may people as possible to spread the kindness and reach as many people as we can.

As a thank you; when I receive your stories and pictures I have a special gift to send you so make sure you get those success stories in. After all, it’s nice to say thank you for taking part.

Together we can make our communities a better place; one small act of kindness at a time.